I get a lot of duplicated notifications across my mac, iphone and ipad. A simple example are calendar events - the notification shows up on all devices. This is fine (and as I want it!), but what bothers me is that if I clear the notification on one device it stays on others. Sometimes that is helpful because it acts as a secondary reminder for some things. But most of the times it is extra work to clear the same notifications across multiple devices. I have googled but have not been able to find a discussion about this - does anyone know a way to syncronise notifications across devices such that if I remove/clear a notification from one device it disappears from all of them?
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Welcome to the MPU!
I do not think that this can be done, but I absolutely would like to see the same.
Most of the time, it really should be possible not to bother me with the same notification on all of my devices. When I have read a notification or if I have interacted with it, it should be the default not to confront me with the same notification on other devices. My solution as of now is that my iPhone gets to notify me with most of the important stuff and especially my iPads are not allowed to notify me with very much. I am careful not to allow too many apps to notify me with whatever.
This year with all this AI talk (whenever it actually will materialize everywhere) Apple has created huge expectations. There are so many low hanging fruits that really could improve the user experience, your scenario is one of them. And this is not even “AI”. It is common sense. Unfortunately not to be found as an option on our devices. 
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+1
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I get reminders from the eponymous app/program coming up on all my Apple devices, viz 2 Macs, iPhone, iPad, and Watch. Also get alarms on my iPhone and Watch (but not on my Macs nor iPad). The devices are all logged into the same iCloud account.
It fascinates me that there is small delay between reminders being displayed on my iPhone and the other devices; only fractions of a second but the delay is discernible. Similarly there is a delay as the reminders are marked as completed; same small but discernible one.
Yes, it would be as simple as keeping an iCloud status property for each notification and if a notification gets cleared on one device, it does the same across all devices.
I only recently converted to the Apple ecosystem and before that I had quite a “draconian” approach to notifications on my android phone - I pretty much only allowed Calendar and select people messages to go through. I’ve been more lenient so far with my Apple devices while I learn what is useful for me and what not.
I like your idea to centralise notifications on phone and then limit them on other devices. Unfortunately that doesn’t work with my most common notification duplication - calendar events. With my ADHD and time blindness I find it absolutely crucial to have calendar event notifications on whatever device I might happen to be. And if I don’t look at my ipad for a whole day, I come back to a bunch of them that I have to clear up manually. Not a big issue for one or two notification types, but it multiplies a lot.
This feature seemed so much common sense that I was hoping I just hadn’t discovered the right setting yet 
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This is a great idea, and I think Apple should just pay you infinite money to implement it. I want it that badly.
The second one I would want would be auto-clearing notifications for things like meetings. I don’t need to be reminded about a meeting that ended 3 days ago that I chose not to attend.
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